Sunday, January 16, 2011

ABDC =A. B[ad]. D[amn]. C[ase] of . . . Am IIIIIII Crazy???

Do you want to be in my crew?

Wait! let me back up in this "tale between two lovers" . . .

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Random girl = what crew do YOU belong to???

Me (the normal one) = I don't.

Random girl = Do you want to be in my crew for "this show?"

Me (the normal one) = What?

Random girl = I'm a choreographer.

Me (the normal one) = ok.

Random girl = Rehearsals would be . . .

Me (the normal one) = (confused as hell) I would need to see some footage.

Random girl = Well what style of dance do you do?

Me (the normal one) = Contemporary, Hip Hop, and Jazz Funk

Random girl = We have a dress code in my crew: ALL BLACK, no make up, no fingernail polish, only double XL shirts, hair slicked back in a ponytail.

Me (the normal one) = (trying to keep from laughing in her face)
Me (the normal one) = ARE YOU SERIOUS?

Random girl = yes.
Random girl = Well I need to know if you want to be a part of my crew. Right now I have a girl who does hip hop and ballet. And I actually had to let go of all of the krumpers that I auditioned last week.

Me (the normal one)= I would need to see some type of footage, better yet, are you taking class today?

Random girl = well I can do that s***! (pointing at the television) What class are you taking?

Me (the normal one) = . . .

Random girl = I don't know her.

Me (the normal one) = Wow. She's actually pretty popular.

Random girl = I'm a choreographer.

Me = Choreographers take class too! lol

Random girl = I need to know if you want to be a part of the crew?

Me = walking away . . .

Random girl = (on to her next victim)

END OF SCRIPT.
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MORAL OF THE STORY: WHAT THE HELL??? This is exactly why taking class is SO important kids! Without constant knowledge being fed into your brain - you may begin to LOSE YOUR DAMN MIND! . . . and think that "You are a choreographer with a crew - ready for ABDC."

never in my life - signing off.


Saturday, January 15, 2011

P.M.S

When Mother Nature works her magic every once and a while . . . you wonder if its to help increase your tolerance level or if its for the "greater good?" To my surprise - I wasn't expecting to encounter any unusual events today, but I did. Yes . . . P.M.S. ladies and sorry gentleman! I actually have an issue when another person comes into the picture and causes my P.M.S to become worse. The irritation escalates to a whole new level! And I couldn't believe that today IT happened in dance class! My Personal.Man.Space was violated BIG TIME! There's this unwritten language of how close you should be to someone, correct? - a pamphlet given to everyone at birth . . . that states: this imaginary box surrounded around me should not be crossed by YOU! Thanks! :) However, I don't think most people . . . dancers understand that. Case in point: in learning choreography in a room packed full of people - its understandable that some accidental contact may occur. Though, if a hand OR BODY gets to close to your face several times - you wonder 2 things - EGO (they assume that YOU are the "new" one bc you aren't going SUPER full out like there's a freakin gold medal prize at the end of this journey) or there really IS a problem??? - not understanding that P.M.S. has been tampered with. Instead of making a scene . . . you politely give subtle hints to show that mayyyyyybe this individual is getting a little TOO close to you = rolling of the eyes, a short sigh, a glance in their direction, or even standing still so that they can in fact hit you. lol Nothing works! The last gesture that you decide to do is to physically place your arms out in a "T" . . . as they instruct you in elementary school, in order to learn Personal Man Space. Still nothing. What do you do? Your PMS has already caused you to encounter all of these "emotional" changes . . . let's go through the most common symptoms: irritability, tension, and unhappiness - check, check, AND CHECK! You also think of the risks of maybe getting older is causing these symptoms or if you forgot your high intake of caffeine this morning. With all that was stated . . . here's the conclusion for this tale between 2 lovers, The Violator and 85% of Women = all you have to do when your Personal.Man.Space has become limited in a dance class is . . . wait for group instruction. Whichever group the instructor tells you to partake in - do the opposite group of your violator. This way said individual will see how wonderfully talented you are without being drenched in a shower of sweat and heavy breathing. And as you "kill" the combo and everyone praises you or hates you - your violator will wonder if all the work he did to distract you was even worth it, as he leaves class defeated. Awwwwwwww (that's my stomach aching from P.M.S) HA!

NOTE: "The exact causes of PMS are not fully understood."

clearly misunderstood - signing off.